to that guy, if anybody notices and reads this and cares.
I got what I wanted. But I feel so fucking old, after 2 and a half years of anxiety from him, and all the long loneliness before him.
I’ve reverted to dwelling on dreams again.
So slap my hand, Dumbledore. You died on me too.
Fuck life.
DAYDREAMER FOREVER!
always love. always reblog.
this is so bittersweet i want to die.
we need more books, not pottermore…
maybe ‘delete pornographic photos of my ex-girlfriend’ should have been on this list?
just MAYBE?
it NEVER crossed your mind?
no?
does she cross your mind when you fuck me, though?
and is she crossing your mind when you won’t fuck me, because it’s her you really want?
i think these words might bother you. so have some sage advice:
read this in silence.
read it well, and remember it well; i will.
don’t pass comment. don’t be cruel.
don’t throw up your defenses now that you’ve been found out and don’t try to deny anything; the pictures disprove any denial you might care to make.
if you’re formulating a rebuttal, stop now.
i may have something to say about all this, i may not.
if i don’t speak now, i may still speak later.
my intention as i write this, in the cool composure that can be found in solitude,
is to do as i did last summer,
and not speak of it.
i can’t say how i’ll feel once you’re here again tomorrow.
but if i feel forgiving and loving you would be wisest to reciprocate in kind, if i have any value at all in your estimation.
fight me, i will fight back.
be ashamed:
for honour’s sake, be ashamed of yourself for just once.
now.
there is nothing which can justify your possession of this image.
so if you are wise, or at all good, you will not try.
and now,
here are my words.
the simple and eternal truth is: you cannot be trusted.
you are a deceiver.
you are a betrayer.
i know now.
the knowing has overshadowed the doubt and the hope
i will sleep curled against you and you will kiss me and i will smile
and love you still and the knowledge will be placed
in a deep dark space in my mind
almost like forgetting,
which is what you want.
no shouting, no scowls, no ‘givin you shit’,
as you would so charmingly describe any woman fighting for the respect she deserves.
but remember that
i never will,
forget,
and certain doors within me have been locked to you forever now.
you won’t notice it;
you never noticed when they were open.
hear me: this betrayal has absolved me,
at last and for always,
of vows i made to you,
spoken and unspoken,
with the trust and pure love of the truly noble maiden,
between the 19th and the 21st of March, 2009.
other vows remain, but those most precious and so rare, i hereby finally renounce.
i don’t think it will bother you.
i don’t think you have the heart or soul to understand what it is that you have lost today.
if you want to be alone, it’s simple.
when your parent/friend/colleague/whoever invites you to go spend time with them, say no.
do not let people sleep in your bed and try to fuck them, that will make them think that you desire their company.
do not spend time in public places.
do not post on forums or enter chatrooms.
delete your facebook/twitter/social networking account.
get rid of your phone, stop reading your emails.
order everything you need via internet, and never leave your house AND/OR move to somewhere isolated and survive by foraging.
do all this, and you will be alone.
i won’t bother you any more.
i love you.
i hate myself and wish more than anything that i could turn off every universe
like a lightswitch, or at the very least
that i myself had never been conceived.
and then you would be happy. which is what i want.
goodbye then
love this.
^This.I’m not going to change for anyone.
well good for fucking you sweetheart but i dont really know many other girls who do any of those things unless its for themselves. be yourself of course but i cant stand this shit. if you wanna make out with boys, do it, do it for you, not for attention, if you wanna do any of these things go for it, if you don’t thats fine too. just stop the girl hate and stop judging everybody else for their choices, if you dont wanna be judged for yours. UGH!
Oh great, internalized sexism based on stereotypes. If this girl doesn’t respect other women, how does she expect others to respect her as a woman?
Would you like an award, dearie? You are most certainly not the only one who doesn’t do those sorts of things.
^^^
i think you guys are missing her point. her point is not that other girls/women should not do those things. nowhere is she condemning women who drink/smoke/party, nor is she suggesting that she is the only woman in the world who doesn’t do those things. she is stating simply who she is, and that she is not going to give way to peer pressure and do the things which, we can assume, the majority of girls she knows do, simply because it is expected of her that she conform. i grew up in a town where 97% of the girls i knew were girls who did those things, and yes, i was made to feel ugly and freakish and less of a woman for not following them. her point is that she will be herself, and do what *she* wants, and it doesn’t make *her* any less of a girl. lay off the hating. she isn’t hating on you or anybody. she is making a statement of self-confidence on her personal tumblr. and i think she is owed an apology. what unbelievable bitchiness. utterly uncalled for. for shame.
